The Twilight Report

rt: north carolina

2011-03-21T13:44:00

I was listening to NPR one day in 2005, as I was oft to do in those days around about the time I decided move back to Australia, when they had an interview of Jasper Fforde, of whom I had never heard of before, in which he read the passage from his brand new Something Rotten in which Prince Hamlet found himself in a modern coffee shop with its bewildering array of choices, and he is required to do the one thing that he is totally ill-equipped to do: make a simple decision. Immediately following my run-on-sentence I decided that was among the most brilliant things I had ever heard and that I needed to read at least the first book in his Thursday Next series. I devoured the first four books in a few weeks and was left with an empty feeling when I realized I would have to wait at least another whole year to read Jasper's new book since he had inconsiderately not written it yet.

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The Fourth Bear and Jindabyne

2006-08-07T01:59:00

Today I trekked into the city to get Jasper Fforde's latest book The Fourth Bear. If you like Douglas Adams, or Terry Pratchett, you might like Fforde. I first heard of him when he did an interview on NPR in which he read a passage from his then latest book, where Hamlet, prince of Denmark, is forced to decide what kind of coffee to get when he steps into a modern (198x) coffee shop and is bewildered by the insurmountable choices (Hamlet being well known for his indecisiveness). Maybe you had to be there.

I was pleased to learn than Fforde's next book will be a Thursday Next novel.

Tonight I went to see the Australian film Jindabyne. See it if you get the chance.

Thursday Next

2005-01-26T11:29:00

I just used the phrase Thursday Next in an e-mail to a friend of mine and it amused me, so I capitalized it as though it were her name instead of the phrase. I am sure the person who received this e-mail doesn't even know who Next is.

Macaroni Custard

2004-11-27T23:11:00

"What's for supper?" I asked, slumping in a chair and closing my eyes.

"I've been experimenting with alternative recipes," said ibb, "so we're having Apples Benedict."

"Apples Benedict?"

"Yes; it's like Eggs Benedict but with--"

"I get the picture. Anything else?"

"Of course you. You could try Turnips à l'Orange or Macaroni Custard; for pudding I've made Anchovy Trifle and Herring Fool. What will you have?"

"Beans on toast."

I sighed. It was like being back home at mother's

From Jasper Fforde's The Well of Lost Plots

Payback

2004-09-30T02:51:00

There's something rotten in the state of Denmark, and Hamlet says ... it's payback time!

Something Rotten, Jasper Fforde

Ham and Cheese

2004-09-28T14:50:00

"What will you have, Ham-I mean, Cousin Eddie?"

"What is there?"

"Espresso, mocha, latte, white mocha, hot chocolate, decaf, recaf, nocaf, somecaf, extracaf, Goliachino^TM... what's the matter?"

Hamlet had started to tremble, a look of pain and hopelessness on his face as he stared wild-eyed at the huge choice laid out in front of him.

"To espresso or to latte, that is the question," he muttered, his free will evaporating rapidly. I had asked Hamlet for something he couldn't easily supply: a decision. "Whether 'tis tastier on the palate to choose white mocha over plain," he continued in a rapid garble, "or to take a cup to go. Or a mug to stay, or extra cream or have nothing, and by opposing the endless choice, end one's heartache-"

"Cousin Eddie!" I said sharply. "Cut it out!"

"To froth, to sprinkle, perchance to drink, and in that-"

"He'll have a mocha with extra cream, please."

Hamlet stopped abruptly once the burden of decision was taken from him.

"Sorry," he said, rubbing his temples, "I don't know what came over me. All of a sudden I had this overwhelming desire to talk for a very long time without actually doing anything. Is that normal?"

Something Rotten, Jasper Fforde

The measure of inertia at The Company is high. To make things worse, I tend to be distracted quite easily. For example, right now I should be working on Feature Number 123879 now that I have dispatched Defect Number 123940. Instead I am sitting here typing in the passage from the latest Thursday Next novel which got me to start reading the books in the first place.

Quality Technobable

2004-09-18T15:04:00

"Someone has wired the retextualization inhibitor to the ISBN Code rectifiers. If the cord had been pulled, there would have been an overheat in the primary booster coils."

The Well of Lost Plots, Jasper Fforde